Mind control

Dear cat
An hour ago I woke up with you sitting on my chest and staring again. Just stare. Why do you keep on staring at me? I told you it's creepy and I am not gona burst into flames. You are not superman and you have not laser beam eyes. Please stop.
Sincerly
/Cat Owner


Dear Human
I'm practicing mind control.
S.
/Your cat


Dear Cat
Seriously? You think you have mind... Do you want more meat perhaps? Or do I need to clean your... Oh, damnit, kitten! Stop it!
Sincerly
Your Slave

Dear Human
Moahahaha....
S.
Your God