Humans are so easy to manipulate

Conversation about this day:

Cat owner:
Hey cat! You went out this morning and were gone for over an hour. Then you came in and first went to the litter box to do your business, then you gobbled down your food as if you're starved for a week and spread out a lot of dry food all over the floor. Finally you jumped up on the table to knock down my cup of tea. All this took you about 10 minutes. Then you went out and was gone for an hour again. You are not welcome back home. I'm going to get me a hamster.

The  Cat:
Have I told you how excited I am to see you?

Cat Owner:
Do not even try ...

The Cat:
Do you want to cuddle? Can I sleep in your lap?

Cat Owner:
* Mumble mumble * I am so damn cheap ...